I was at a point in my life where alone his did not feel so wrong. I enjoyed the time I just had for myself. I was my own centre. My life. My world.
But then you came. And you have, without realizing it, changed my whole world.
Our first meeting was kind of odd. I didn’t know you, and yet I ended up at your couch in your home. Without even having spoken a word with you before.
I was on this day with a couple of ‘ friends ‘ who I met only shortly before. I never thought it would be the beginning of something this big.
For the four friends, we decided to look for a place to have a few drinks and found you.
So I sat with Marie in your living room, kinda lost a little bit. You were in the kitchen. Confident. Sure.
I guess I’ll never forget that moment when you first looked into my eyes.
It wasn’t just a random look. That was a lot more. Much longer. Intense.
After a few hours we went back towards the city. I might have exchanged only five sentences with you. Just before I went out of your life again through the front door, you caught my attention once more.
This is not a clichéd romance, with love at first sight. But it’s love.
Just two months later, I came back to Australia. For a festival. I know this sounds totally absurd. 25 hours flight for three days at the other end of the world.
A friend picks me up from the airport. I didn’t really have you in my heart at this point.
The next day, we should go by car towards subsonic. The friend I wanted to drive with, bailed out at short notice.
Happiness in misfortune.
So you were at the door Thursday morning and took me in your car. That was the beginning of a very special story. of a very special time. From you and me.
Festival back or forth, the following three days were more exciting everything else ever before. We spent every second together. Every moment.
Sunday evening we drove back to Sydney. My flight home-Monday.
I spent the night with you. After an extensive and long shower we only have to go to bed. That’s it. No more and no less. A special kiss before we both went to sleep.
My last thought, I don’t want to wake up tomorrow. I don’t want to go home. Germany. So far away from here. So infinitely far away. From you.
We went for breakfast and still for a short round in the park. We didn’t really talk. There was silence. Not because we didn’t want to communicate, more because we couldn’t. I guess we didn’t know what to say. Grief? Uncertainty? I think it was much more than that.
Arm in arm we made slow steps. In my mind were so many thoughts, so many moments that I had not yet processed.
I wasn’t ready to go. I wanted to stay here. With you.
I think the same thing happened to you inside your head. You took your phone out of your pocket and asked me if you could try to postpone my flight. 4 hours before departure. Ridiculous. Wasted time.
That was more than understood by you from the beginning. After all, you worked as a travel agent.
I noticed that we both felt empty and strange. Can I really just get on the plane like this? As if nothing had happened? As if it just never existed?
No. The answer was simple. Action was only much more difficult. However, I came to a point where I did not care about any setbacks whatsoever and in this case money.
I missed my plane. I called my mama and told her I needed more time. More time with a new person in my life. More time with a person I don’t really know. More time with you.
The following week felt like a year. However, time flew by.
The day of departure had come. There was no return. I finally had to go home. I had to work. I had to live my life. I had to go back to my world.
Suddenly I wasn’t so sure of what my world actually was.
The silence at the airport reminded me of the situation in the park, a week earlier. Only this time we both knew that I would be gone in a few moments. For how long? Uncertain.
I went and you fell on your knees at the airport. Later you got lost, looking for the parked car for over an hour.
A clear exit? Never. My flight consisted of tears, anxiety, sadness and at the same time joy, love and a feeling that I had not yet been able to know.
I realised that after these ten days nothing would be the same like before. I arrived home know with learning this truth.
In fact, nothing has changed, and yet everything was different.
You’re one of the most impressive & loving people I’ve ever been able to meet.
I am so infinitely thankful that you stand by my side every day. The decision to abandon everything and to follow my feelings was the best of my life.
You were the best choice. Our relationship. Our love. The ‘ Us ‘.
I love every moment with you. I live with you every moment. Thank you.